Hold onto me

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It’s cold here, it’s getting harder to sleep;
Each coming day gets harder, it’s getting easier to weep.
My shoulders hurt, troubles weigh me down;
While the past runs circles around me, going round and round.
Is there a guiding light? One that can show me the way;
To a happy tomorrow? Anywhere better than this day?
The loss of want, of need, of love;
I’ve searched for help from everyone except up above.
Lessons learnt in the sun and the rain;
Do a great job of helping me mask the pain.
I’ve longed to get back to the life before;
Where I had someone, now they’re all part of lore.
The tears have dried up, but the tracks remain;
Under the laughs, under the smile, that’s such a strain.
I miss the arms I used to hold on to, they seem so distant;
I miss the heart I used to cling on to, it seems non-existent.
Each cigarette numbs the pain in this very weak heart;
Each drag killing it little by little, part by part.
My body can take the beating, it will make it through the war;
But my heart is drowning, failing to even wash up ashore.
The ledge is right there, I visit it every day;
But heights scare me and only heighten the despair.
What’s the use of being in a world where love is no more?
What’s the use of being in a world where trusting each other is kept as score?
Someday I’ll get over my fear of heights;
Someday I’ll try and forget everything that give me the frights.
I hope that when I have the courage to step on that ledge, looking down;
I turn around to see the life I leave behind;
The life for which I’ve tried to fight for and grind.
That when I put my arms out, there’s someone to hold on to me;
Pull me back and tell me that I need to be.
Tell me that the tears were worth it and pain was fine;
Tell me that I had love and that they were all mine.

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